I am not really in a writing mood right now, but I am in a list-making mood. And an honesty mood. Since I doubt you are interested in reading my grocery and errand lists, I am going to share a (slightly) more interesting list. Here are some things I'm learning about myself, others and life in general:
1. I am indeed learning without being in graduate school. I am still struggling with feelings of regret and insecurity about not having a master's degree (and the career to whitch it hypothetically leads), but I am still reading, seeking knowledge and interacting with people who enrich and increase my understanding of and appreciation for life.
2. Holding grudges holds you back. Forgive yourself and others so you can move on with your life.
3. You get out what you put in. Don't expect others to include you in things if you never include them in things. Relationships are built on mutual initiative and inclusion.
4. Try to keep the seriousness/silliness ratio around 40/60. Smiling and laughing is always more attractive than scowling. More importantly, it makes you feel better.
5. We all feel alone sometimes. Thinking you are always the only one who is alone is extremely self-centered. If you need help to get rid of this feeling, get it. And then join the rest of us crazy loners as we fumble around, shaking hands and making small talk because the awkwardness always outweighs the loneliness.
6. The harder you fight for control, the more it will elude you. That said, some things are worth fighting for.
7. The best antidote for worrying about yourself is helping other people. In fact, it is probably the best antidote for any emotional ailment.
8. Be generous with your time and money, but only to the point where it feels comfortable. Do not give grudgingly; if you do, the gift has no value.
9. If you are worried about what others think of you, recognize that they rarely, if ever, do. I do not say this cynically; it's just the truth.
10. To end with the most cliche of all cliches, life is short and uncertain. We are fragile and at the mercy of forces beyond our control. What we can control is how we treat ourselves, each other and our planet. I'm learning to treat these things with a little more love. Thank you to those of you who are doing the same.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Everything is Music
I recently discovered that all of my favorite activities derive from the root word "muse": musing, amusing others, being amused, making music and listening to music. Most of us know that within the framework of Greek mythology, the Muses were goddesses who presided over the arts; there were nine, and each specialized in a different art form. We also know that a muse is an entity that inspires us to accomplish creative tasks. Some of you may be scoffing at these mythological definitions, and I am right there with you. I firmly believe that "muse" is more a verb than a noun and more internal than external. To muse is to contemplate, to silently and intentionally reflect and speculate. This process is the harbinger of art. So what does any of this have to do with amusement? Implicit in the notion of amusement are those of diversion and escape; we are amused because we are distracted from that which is not amusing, namely life itself. Think about it, though - what amuses you the most: highly abstract humor or humor that derives from, perhaps pokes fun at, the banality of our daily existence? I'm a slapstick, awkward situation and bodily function-loving girl myself. In other words, I am most entertained (and entertaining) when I observe (or joke about) the hilarity of human existence. I am amused and amusing when I understand that I am in on the joke and that the joke is on me. My theory is that we cannot produce or understand true amusement until we are able to laugh at ourselves. And in order to laugh at ourselves, we must muse on our shortcomings, our quirks, our bodily functions. We must fully embrace being human.
I consider music to be the ultimate expression of humanity, the highest product of our musings on our own existence. As with amusement, there is the implied notion of escape. It's not an unfounded association: the image of a troubled youth drowning out his parents' fighting, nagging, etc. with headphones is very real. But if you put yourself in that youth's shoes (in the unlikely event that you haven't already worn them to their soles as I have), you know that this isn't really an effort to escape. It is actually an effort to reconnect, to remind yourself that you are part of something bigger than your immediate family or whichever situation is weighing on you. That's why music is called the universal language - it is by, for and about all of us. It is a club to which we all belong. Of course, we all have unique musical preferences, but most of us can at least appreciate others' appreciation of different genres (I'm really trying to give country music a chance). The only thing better than listening to music is making it, and the only thing better than making music is making music with a group of other musicians. I have had the pleasure of jamming and performing with some extremely talented musicians; unsurprisingly, these sessions have proved quite amusing and have caused me to muse on what is important in life more than any other activity.
So what is important in life? Being happy? Being a good person? Being successful (whatever that means)? Traveling all around the world? Getting married and having kids? I think it's all important, and here is why: in order for us to keep making music, we need to cover everything. There are a lot of songs out there already, and there are infinitely more that need to be written, sung and listened to. The key distinction is that knowing what is important doesn't always mean doing what is important. None of us can do everything, even things we think we should do in order to lead important lives. That does not mean that we can't think about these things and express our feelings about them in a meaningful way; in fact, some of the best art derives from our failure to achieve the things we desire most. I do not recommend pursuing impossible dreams for art's sake, but I do recommend reflecting on possibilities which could prove impossible. Incidentally, I also recommend listening to Iron & Wine, Nick Drake, Fleet Foxes and Arcade Fire, creating as many inside jokes as possible, laughing with great gusto and picking up that neglected instrument (perhaps your voice) again. If you do the latter, I am confident that everything will become brighter for you as it has for me. To quote the ever-wise words of Jack Black, "For those about to rock, I salute you."
I consider music to be the ultimate expression of humanity, the highest product of our musings on our own existence. As with amusement, there is the implied notion of escape. It's not an unfounded association: the image of a troubled youth drowning out his parents' fighting, nagging, etc. with headphones is very real. But if you put yourself in that youth's shoes (in the unlikely event that you haven't already worn them to their soles as I have), you know that this isn't really an effort to escape. It is actually an effort to reconnect, to remind yourself that you are part of something bigger than your immediate family or whichever situation is weighing on you. That's why music is called the universal language - it is by, for and about all of us. It is a club to which we all belong. Of course, we all have unique musical preferences, but most of us can at least appreciate others' appreciation of different genres (I'm really trying to give country music a chance). The only thing better than listening to music is making it, and the only thing better than making music is making music with a group of other musicians. I have had the pleasure of jamming and performing with some extremely talented musicians; unsurprisingly, these sessions have proved quite amusing and have caused me to muse on what is important in life more than any other activity.
So what is important in life? Being happy? Being a good person? Being successful (whatever that means)? Traveling all around the world? Getting married and having kids? I think it's all important, and here is why: in order for us to keep making music, we need to cover everything. There are a lot of songs out there already, and there are infinitely more that need to be written, sung and listened to. The key distinction is that knowing what is important doesn't always mean doing what is important. None of us can do everything, even things we think we should do in order to lead important lives. That does not mean that we can't think about these things and express our feelings about them in a meaningful way; in fact, some of the best art derives from our failure to achieve the things we desire most. I do not recommend pursuing impossible dreams for art's sake, but I do recommend reflecting on possibilities which could prove impossible. Incidentally, I also recommend listening to Iron & Wine, Nick Drake, Fleet Foxes and Arcade Fire, creating as many inside jokes as possible, laughing with great gusto and picking up that neglected instrument (perhaps your voice) again. If you do the latter, I am confident that everything will become brighter for you as it has for me. To quote the ever-wise words of Jack Black, "For those about to rock, I salute you."
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